A Bieber Love Story

The Locket of Hair part 110:

Welcome Home

RETWEET BEFORE YOU READ PLEASE :(
*Justin’s point of view*

“Can we get the fuck on the plane already I have a woman to get to?” I spat.

Everyone turned to stare at me wide eyed and mouths gaping. It was a bit of a dick moment for me but I really needed to get home to Sam before I lost my goddamn mind. I’d lost track of how many days I’d been away from home but none of that mattered. Today was the day and I was finally gonna get to see the love of my life. I’d never been so thankful for an award show. I was starting to forget what she looked like we’d been apart so long. I can’t tell you how many times I stared at the picture Nick sent me. That’s all I had.

“Justin I don’t have time for you to be a prick today alright?” Scooter said knocking me down so I knew who was in charge. “We’re getting on this plane not so you can run home and have sex but so you can go to rehearsals for the award show so get your head on straight dammit.”

I looked down biting my lip and feeling a little hurt. Here I was thinking that all those days of being professional and doing whatever anyone asked of me had made Scooter happy. But the one time I crack under the pressure of missing the only thing that makes my heart beat slower and faster at the same time he yells at me. How can you call someone a prick for missing their fiancé? That just made no damn sense to me.

Apparently not to Scooter either cause he let out a sigh and slid a reassuring hand onto my shoulder.

“Hey,” He murmured. “sorry alright? We’re all a little irritable around here. I know you miss her I just need you to stay focused a little bit longer. I’m gonna give you an hour to go home and shower and shit but I need you at rehearsals today on time.”

I nodded softly. “Can I bring Sam?”

He rolled his eyes but reluctantly muttered. “Fine.”

That put a smile on my face like no other as we headed for the plane. The truth was promo tour hadn’t been nearly as bad as I was making it out to be. But that’s only because of my fans. If it was only about running to each and every interviewer to ask me the same five fucking questions over and over again I’d probably go insane. The fans were amazing and passionate and just happy to see me just like I was happy to see them. After ending the promo tour in New Zealand we begin to head back to the states for teen choice. My performance I was excited for but the award show itself? Not so much.

A twelve hour plane right isn’t the most fun thing in the world and we do have to find things to entertain ourselves. This of course let to a small incident on the plan. I don’t cuss that much to begin with and I especially don’t cuss around my fans or in a general area where it could lead to bad publicity. But at the end of the day I’m an eighteen year old guy am I expected to speak like an eighty year old woman? We were in first class—though I think there were different names for their seating but whatever—with their disgusting food and their plush seats and the guys and I were just having fun when a woman came up to me and tapped me on the shoulder.

“Stop yelling curse words and using that kind of language on a plane. It's not appropriate and everyone can hear you. My children do not need to hear that.”

My first thought was to react with anger. She kind of embarrassed me and something about the male species likes to react to embarrassment with anger. Then I thought what my mom would’ve done if she’s heard me cussing like that. I wasn’t cussing nearly as much as the other guys but being who I was left me with more of a responsibility. None the less my mom would’ve kicked my ass and it’s as simple as that. Her kids were clearly little and didn’t need to hear the stuff we were yelling like idiots. So I apologized just as quick as the cuss words had exited my mouth. In the end everything was okay but after the incident I just wanted to take my ass home to my fiancé.

After twelve hours on a plane and a half hour drive from the airport to my house things were finally starting to go my way. I could just imagine her face when I saw her. How smooth her skin would be. How addictive her giggles were. How plump her lips were. It made my body ache just to think about it. Sure it was almost five in the afternoon but I didn’t care I was about to see my baby.

The car was still running when I leaped out leaving everyone else behind. My luggage was still in the car but who gives a fuck about luggage? I ran for steps heart pounding in the pit of my chest. Shoving the key in the lock and throwing the door out of my way I ran straight into the house.

“Sam?! Baby I’m here I’m home!” I cried out.

Not waiting for a reply I headed up the stairs holding onto the front of my jeans so I didn’t land on my ass. When I got to our room I was out of breath but when I stepped inside my heart broke. She wasn’t even there. She’d been there recently due to the wet towel at the front of the bed and the smell of her perfume lingering in the air. I’d probably missed her by like half an hour. Collapsing on the bed in disappointment my heart sunk. Why did everything bad in the world have to happen to me? Okay so that was extremely dramatic but still…

My phone rang in vibration alerting me with a text from Scooter.

From Scooter: Remember rehearsals in an hour Justin I’m serious.
From Justin: Yea that won’t be a problem. She’s not even here.

From Scooter: Damn sorry she’s scheduled for a meeting today I didn’t know she’d left already.
From Justin: Thanks bro -.-

From Scooter: Calm down okay? Get in the shower I’ll call Nick she’ll be there for rehearsals.
From Justin: :D that’s better

From Scooter: Don’t get used to it. Now go shower and get your ass ready.
From Justin: Whatever Scoot Scoot. See you in a hour.

I threw my phone down and sighed with the realization that Sam wasn’t there. Pulling my clothes off in frustration I headed into the shower letting the hot water burn my skin. Hunting around for my tooth brush another wave of irritation hit me knowing Sam must as moved it. She hated that I brushed my teeth in the shower. More so she hated that my tooth brush fell on the floor of the shower and she’d fallen a couple of times. I smiled to myself remembering the couple times I’d heard a loud thunk from the bathroom and found her collapsed in the shower. Only Sam.

It occurred to me that at home by myself in the shower I could’ve jacked off (EW I HATE THAT WORD) That’s at least what most normal eighteen year old guys seem to spend every second of their life doing. Don’t get me wrong horniess has never been a problem for me. I think I just wanted to save myself for Sam. And that of course isn’t what a normal eighteen year old guy would say. But something was starting to occur to me. What if I just wasn’t a normal eighteen year old guy?

*Sam’s point of view*

I woke up around two in the afternoon to Nick nudging my ass awake again. When sleep finally found me I was ready to go into hibernation and didn’t plan on leaving my coma anytime soon. Of course that was just not gonna be allowed to happen now was it?

“Come on get up you got a meeting!” He insisted. “And we have to pick out your dress for the tcas so get up and get in the shower.”

It took him about fifteen minutes to get my ass out of the bed and a couple shoves to get me in the bathroom. From then I just decided to get it the hell over with and get in the shower. The hot water ran over my skin awakening my bones and making me shiver. I thought about Justin the entire time. Miley and Demi had both had to leave for work leaving me to sleep but now he was the only thing on my mind. A twelve hour flight from New Zealand and I didn’t even know what time he was getting on the plane. It sucked. I’d done what neither of us thought I could do and now I was ready to see my mothafuckin baby dammit. –le sighs life just isn’t fair.

We got out of the shower and got dressed in a cute dress grabbing my heels and running for the door as Nick screamed that we were late. Getting in the car I sighed sliding my shoes on and running my fingers through my hair. When I finally got to breathe and look down at my phone my heart broke into a sprint.

From Justin: About to get on the plane and come home to you. I know we can’t talk but I’ve been missing you so bad lately and I just want you to know I love you baby. I can’t wait to see you and hold you and hug you and squeeze you. I know that’s a lot but . . . get over it ;D I even typed it all properly for you . . . thanks to spell check. I’ll see you later okay? I love you baby so much bye <3

That text meant the world to me like you have no idea. I expected after that the entire day to be perfect. My ass was dead wrong. My meeting was bullshit and every idea I had was shot down. Paparazzi were ablazing suffocating me to points end. My heel broke on the street and we had to run to a random ass store to get another pair. My fans tried to make me feel better but they go pushed away by security. Um let’s see I broke a nail. I got yelled at my every single person in each meeting. By the time we were heading to get my dress for the award show I was pissed the fuck off. But I thought since I love playing dress up this will get my mind off things. I was dead ass wrong of course…

*Justin’s point of view*

“Look I’m gonna go ahead and let you meet her now but you gotta get going now.” Scooter explained.

I smiled super wide and practically jumped on top of him hugging him as tight as possible until he shoved me off laughing. Running for the door with Moshe I jumped into my van hitting the back of my seat like a little kid until we headed off down the road. The time was finally here. I was going to see Sam. She was gonna be happy and she was gonna be smiling. My heart skipped a beat just at the thought of it. We weren’t driving fast enough but my eyes kept staring down at the picture on my phone of her at that photoshoot. She was so beautiful, it hurt. I just needed to see her. Things wouldn’t feel right until saw her.

We stopped at this little boutique or whatever where designers had I guess sent dresses for Sam to try on and pick which one she liked. The dresses didn’t concern me; she’d look stunning in whatever she picked. What concerned me was the girl inside the dress. Moshe opened the door for me so we could walk inside. Paparazzi were out of course but seemed to stick to being bearable for once. I walked with my hands in my pockets trying to keep all my emotions inside no matter how hard it truly, truly was. As soon as we got through the door though I just couldn’t contain myself. Screeching that I was looking for Samantha McCartney the poor assistant at the front desk nearly had a heart attack. Oops :D

“S—sorry.” I mumbled.

She caught her breath and put on a fake smile. “Of course. Right this way Mr. Bieber.”

Leading back through wooden hallways I listened to her clack against the floor just wishing I could see my baby. But as soon as she led me through the door that was the last thing I wanted. Her voice was screaming out in a muffled tortured cry. Big gasps of breaths left her throat as she seemed to struggle to breathe. I couldn’t see her but I could sure as hell hear her. A woman and Nick were pressed up against a door calling to her as I watched in utter confusion continuing to hear Sam cry. Why was she crying? Why wasn’t she happy? What the fuck was going on?

“What’s happening?!” I interrupted.

They both turned to me and Nick automatically sighed a sigh of relief.

“You. You’re the only who can get her out of that room. Do it please!” He gasped.

I didn’t ask questions or even hesitate because I knew she was in there hurt by something. Moving everyone out of the way I asked them to leave and made sure the door was close before heading to the door that locked me away from Sam. She was still crying, still gasping not even knowing probably that I was there.

“S—Samantha?” I called through the wood.

“GO AWAY! I AM NOT COMING OUT OF THIS FUCKING ROOM EVER AGAIN!!” She cried.

I bit my lip. “Baby it’s me. It’s Justin. Open the door please sweetie?”

“J—Justin?” She asked hesitantly.

“Yes it’s Justin come on open the door baby.” I cooed.

I heard her scramble off the floor and fumble with the handle before the door appeared. That was so not supposed to be my first look of her. Her face was red trickles of water streaming down her face in sadness. Eyes bloodshot and nose stuffed she looked so sad it pained me to look at her. A dress was hanging off her chest revealing a beige strapless bra that didn’t remotely turn me on. I just wanted to know why she was so upset. Moving my way into the door I sat down on the floor next to her and closed us up in the room once again. She let me take her body in my hands hiding her face in my chest as she continued to cry.

“Sammy come on don’t cry. I’m right here don’t cry.” I whispered. “Just tell me what’s wrong. Why are you crying?”

“Because I’m a fucking cow that’s why!” She cried into my chest the sound muffled by my shirt.

I pulled her out of my chest then fingers locking around the back of her neck in a steal grip.

“Hey why would you say that? You’re not a cow Samantha you’re beautiful what are you even talking about?” I insisted.

She kept gasping trying to get the words out. “I—I kept trying on dresses and, and n—none of them fit. None of them zip. They’re all t—too tight. And . . . and . . . I’M A FAT ASS!”

She crumpled again breaking down in front of me as tears began to spill harder than before. I didn’t even remotely know how to dresses worked but I knew what she looked good in and what fit her body style right and the dress she was trying to fit into wasn’t even it.

“Baby stop crying and look at me please?” I murmured.

She looked up swallowing with those big brown eyes staring up at me.

“You are not a cow do you hear me? Your body is perfect? I love it and so do millions of other people. I never wanna hear those words come out of your mouth again.”

“Of course you have to say that, you’re my fiancé.” She cried.

I sighed. “Exactly I’m your fiancé and if I like your body then you shouldn’t give a fuck what any other person thinks. But what about you?”

She slumped down on the floor making my hands slide softly from her neck. I watched her tilt her head to the floor biting her lip and hiding her face in her hair.

“I just . . . I just wanna wear what I wanna wear and I want to feel beautiful in it.” She whispered voice broken.

“Well what size are you babe?” I asked softly.

“I don’t even know. My torso is a different size then my ass or my thighs.” She muttered.

“Because you have c—“

“I swear to fucking god if you start talking about curves I’m gonna snap. They’re not curves okay?! I’m fat!”

I sighed. “If you don’t like your body then we really do have a problem.”

“Then I guess we have a problem.” She sniffled.

“Can I . . . show you what I think you should wear?” I asked smoothly.

She looked up at me with sad eyes. “Justin you don’t get it do you? None of these dresses are going to fit me.”

Her lips started to quiver and she looked down as more tears choked her. She was breaking my heart. I reached for her sliding my fingers down the back of her neck and kissing her forehead.

“Just stay here. I’ll be right back.” I told her.

Getting off the floor and pulling my pants up I opened the door heading over to the racks and racks of clothes. A lot of the dresses were for one body type and one body type only. Stick thin. Some of them I had to wonder how Sam could even fit a boob into them. Then that made me think of her boobs all pushed together and I had to clear my head for a second. Ugly colors. Weird fabrics. Things I knew Sam wouldn’t’ wear even if she could. It didn’t take long at all to find the right dress. I knew Sam and I knew what she’d like, feel comfortable in. It was different from what she usually wore but still perfect. I smiled just at the thought of her in it.

Walking into the room again decided to stop pitying her. Usually when someone is acting the way she was all they want is some attention but there’s a difference between attention and pitying. A little tough love would do her good. I pulled Sam up off the ground like a rag doll and pressed her into the counter watching her head hit softly on the glass of the mirror.

“Samantha I want you to listen to me now alright? This is bullshit and quite frankly I’m sick of it. The only possible thing that could be wrong with your body is making every guy on the planet want you in sick and gross ways. And that’s pretty good problem to have. Now here’s what’s going to happen. You’re going to take this perfect dress and try it on. It’s going to fit like a glove. Then you’re gonna get dressed thank the woman and we’re gonna go have a romantic lunch filled with kissing and hand holding. I‘m not gonna ask any more questions about what’s going on with you unless you feel comfortable telling me about it. Is that understood?” I demanded.

She nodded her head jerkily staring at me in shock.

“Now kiss me dammit. I missed you.” I growled.

Instead of waiting for her I snatched her up in my arms crushing my mouth down on hers. She was reluctant at first but soon groaned kissing back just as passionately as me. I slid my tongue against her bottom lip begging for entrance. She opened willingly letting me dive inside as our tongues began to battle for dominance. You can always tell when Sam’s really started to get into it. Her fingers start scratching at my scalp pulling my hair by the root. This sort of lustful grunt begins to pour from her throat. And that tongue . . . man that tongue works wonders. But I knew I only wanted to give her taste so as much as it literally pained me to do so I pulled away from her mouth licking my bottom lip.

“I wanna see you outside this room n five minutes or I’m coming in.” I smiled lips lethal.

Without waiting for a reply I walked out of the door pulling t closed and smirking to myself. Damn I was good. Everyone came back into the room waiting for Sam to make her grand entrance. The woman assigned to help her with the dresses was on the verge of tears mistaking a lack of self-esteem induced meltdown for a diva scream fest. The poor thing probably thought she was gonna lose her job. But Sam’s not liked that. We’re not like that.

A few minutes went by and I bit my lip calling out to her just to make sure.

“Does it fit?!”

“Shut up Justin.” She muttered.

I laughed softly. Of course it fit. A few seconds later the door opened hesitantly and she stepped out in beautiful dress that had everyone in the room gasping. It was this thin soft fabric with a very vibrant type print. Your yellows and peaches and baby blues and blue greens with swirls of black. It wrapped around the neck and had a trail that flowed out behind her. This belt thingy on the bodice insinuating her waist and making her look beautiful. She looked . . . amazing to say the least. But it didn’t matter what I thought now did it?

“Sam you look amazing!” Nick exclaimed.

“Yes really gorgeous.” The lady promised.

I bit my lip. “It doesn’t matter what we think do you like it?”

She looked down hiding a smile. “Yea.”

“Do you feel comfortable?”

“Yes.” She murmured.

“What about beautiful?” I checked.

It took her a second but I finally got it. “Y—yes.”

I sighed a sigh of relief. “Why don’t you go change out of that and I’ll take you out to eat alright?”

She bit her lip looking up at me. “Okay.”

I waited for her to come back thanking God that she’d found something to make her happy. It was a rocky start to being back home but whatever you have to do for the people you loved right? And I loved her. I loved her so damn much.

*Sam’s point of view*

I changed back into my normal clothes and walked out of the building Justin’s hand. He intertwined our fingers and the warmth was just too amazing for words. Moshe took us back to the party van while another car took Nick to go meet up with Scooter for more stuff for me I guess. So that left just me and Justin in the big wide space. As soon as the doors were closed and the paparazzi were gone he pulled my seatbelt off and my body deep into his arms. Curling up against his chest I folded my legs up in his lap just needing all the warmth that he brought.

“I miss you so bad.” I mumbled voice still cracked.

“Then how come you won’t look at me with those beautiful eyes of yours?” He taunted lightly.

I couldn’t help but giggle and looked up at him finally.

“Ahh see now that’s better.” He smiled moving my hair out of my face. “I miss you too baby.”

My cheeks burned. “How was promo tour?”

“Really good. Got a little sick and stuffy but you know me I always pull through.” He shrugged.

I could help but just wrap his arms around my and press my face into his chest. He smelled like heaven and I’d almost begun to forget the scent.

“I never want you to leave me again.” I mumbled.

He chuckled. “You always turn into a baby when I come home.”

I scoffed. “Do not!”

“Do too.” He said.

“DO NOT!” I insisted.

“Samantha you are fighting like a five year old.” He said.

I blushed realizing he was right and rolling me eyes. He tightened his arms around me making me giggle. The van continued to move and my mind hit a mighty interesting topic.

“So uh . . . you got like two days till the show right?” I asked.

He smiled. “Yep. Just finished rehearsals. We’ll go over it again the day of the show and then I’ll get out there and do my best.”

“Basically . . . you got nothing to do for two days?” I guessed.

He looked down at me. “Yea . . . Babe what are you getting out here?”

I bit my lip reaching forward to press my lips to his magical ear.

“I wanna do things we never do. I want you to make me scream like I’ve never screamed before. I wanna leave marks on your back that you’ll feel for days. I wanna to it shard and deep and slow and passionate. I want you to make love to me Justin. That’s what I’m getting at.”

He looked at me for a second mouth gaping open.

“H—how . . . Do you expect me to go eat for an hour with touching you?” He gasped “You’re underestimated myself control y—you’re . . . I can’t.”

I giggled a little and found my way to get back at him for what he did to me for all that teasing shit. Sliding out of my seat I straddled his lap licking my bottom lip and staring at him seductively.

“Sam p—please.” He muttered.

I smirked. “Oh baby stop stuttering I just wanna make you feel you good.” I murmured leaning close to his ear again. “Don’t you wanna feel good?”

“I . . . yea . . . but.” He sputtered.

Biting down on my lip again I slid my hands onto his knees giving me room to lean back and push my pelvic closer into his groin. A deep grunt escaped his lips bringing me utter satisfaction. He slipped his hands onto my waist closing his eyes and throwing his head back as I continued to move myself on him. Despite how happy it made me to upset him it didn’t feel too bad dry hump him either. Moving my lips to his neck I enjoyed my whorish moment finding his sweet spot and sucking it nice and slow as he moaned.

A sharp gasped escaped his mouth. His teeth were clenched, jaw tight trying to keep it in his pants I suppose. Awww my baby was just so cute. Running my fingers through his soft hair and knocking the snap back off I smiled. I was enjoying my power and continued to mess with him. I ran my fingers down his shirt covered chest before resting my fingers on his belt and smiled wickedly. The van came to a stop signaling that we’d arrived at the restaurant. Positive that it was in deed a boner that was pressing up into my ass I reached down to my hips picking up his frozen hands and going to put them back in their place. Keeping one hand I watched him watch me in astonishment as I nibbled his fingers softly going as far as to take one into my mouth before sliding off with a pop of my lips. Another moan escaped his lips and I smiled dropping his hand and promptly moving off his lap, and out of the car. That’s what happens when you tease Samantha McCartney.

* * *

Lunch was romantic despite the precious events that had taken place. Justin stayed in the car for like five minutes leaving me to face the paparazzi alone with Moshe. And quite frankly Moshe scared the living shit out of me. You got the sense that he probably knew seven ways to kill you without dropping a spot of blood. Which of course was a nice quality to have as a body guard. I don’t know he just wasn’t Kenny. Memories of me and Justin first getting to know each other always included Kenny tagging along with us kids. I knew Jenny was never really a body guard but he loved Justin, he protected him with his life yet knew that the fans would never actually hurt him. Moshe wasn’t exactly gentle with fans at times. It was more than work for Kenny. Moshe really is sweeter than he appears—not to mention Justin brings out the best in everyone—but Moshe would never Kenny. The good news was he knew that.

We went inside and got seated waiting for Justin to find a way to hide his little problem from the papas. Then when he did come in he went passed the table and headed straight for the bathroom another five minutes later he was back with water very obviously dripping from his face. He looked so damn adorable.

I was staring at a menu my stomach growling like crazy when a hand reached out to grab mine. Looking up Justin was smiling causing my cheeks to burn. Why did he have to be so perfect? He started to rub his thumb back and forth a long my hand giving me goose bumps.

“You know what you want baby?” He asked knowing damn well that I loved when he called me baby. UNF.

“Y—yea.” I murmured.

“And what’s that?” He smiled.

I blushed looking down in embarrassment causing him to chuckle.

“What? Tell me!” He begged playfully.

“Chicken fingers and fries.” I muttered

It was childish sure but that didn’t stop me from wanting my damn fingers of chicken.

He sighed. “You’re so adorable.”

My cheeks burned again. “Thanks babe.”

He was about to respond when our waitress came over throwing an overly happy smile Justin’s way.

“Hi my name’s Sarah can I start you off with something to drink?”

“Actually I think we’re ready to order.” Justin said in a nice tone.

“Alright then what can I get you?”

Notice how this dumb bitch only acknowledged Justin -.- Guess who wasn’t getting a tip?

“Well I’ll have a coke and she likes diet. And then I think we’re gonna both kick it old school and do chicken fingers with the fries.” He said in a very swaggy manner.

He knew I loved when he ordered for me. How long do I have to tell you he’s trying to kill me? The waitress smiled at him like he’d just saved her life giggling enough to piss me off. I fucking hate gigglers. Like bitch seriously what is so funny?

“Any sauce?”

“I want ketchup but baby you like barbeque right?” He asked looking to me for approval with a warm smile.

Our waitress reluctantly turned to stare at me with a bored expression. This bitch.

“Yea baby, that’s perfect.” I smiled trying not to let her get to me.

Sarah or Bitch or whatever the hell her name was wrote down our order and took the menus her hands lingering on Justin’s way too long. I watched her walk away and tried to remember some of that self-control shit we’d learned in anger management.

“Wow I’m very surprised at you.” Justin exclaimed.

“What about?” I asked turning my attention back to him.

“That girl was all over me. And I didn’t hear a single cuss word come out of that pretty little mouth of yours.” He smirked. “Anger management must be doing you some good.”

“I’m a changed girl. Hallelujah.” I joked.

He kept smiling at me. “I missed you so much. How did anger management and therapy go. I wanna hear all about it.”

I bit my lip. “Well anger management has been blah. I’m not really learning much but ten more classes and I’m done so it’s whatever. And therapy . . . . well therapy was defiantly interesting.”

Keeping my eyes on the table I prayed that maybe just maybe he’d let it go but no chance.

“What kind of interesting? Good or bad, what happened?” He offered.

“N—nothing.” I stuttered.

“Don’t lie to me Samantha.” He said.

“I just had a . . . a dream.” I gave in.

“Well… Jeez Sam I wanna know what happened just spill it already.” He sighed.

“Alright, alright.” I muttered.

So I explained it. And it took a while to get out the whole picture and explain to him what I felt I wanted him to know. He held my hand the whole time except for when our food came and I still hadn’t finished yet. Getting it all out was so relieving; once I started I didn’t want to stop until he knew everything that I did. It was hard to know how he felt on the situation though cause he showed no emotion just listening intently to the words I spoke.

“And I just told her I’m so sorry.” I said voice trembling remembering the tears. “And she said . . . she said…”

“What? What did she say Sam?” He gasped.

I stopped touching my food and reached across the table to hold his hand again.

“She said, ‘Mommy you can’t do that. It wasn’t your fault I promise. And you can’t let daddy think it was his fault either. The longer you blame yourselves the more pain will be inflicted.’ J—Justin do you blame yourself for that?”

And that’s when he froze.

*Justin’s point of view*

My body was frozen as her words traveled throughout my ears. The dream—the way she described it—made it seem so real and so alive. It was a crazy concept but when Sam explained it how couldn’t I believe her. The vivid detail of her face, hair, skin, laugh. And the fact that she knew that I’d blamed myself ever since that day. What choice was I left with but to know it was real? No one else had to see it that way but that was just the way I felt.

“We should talk about this at later.” I said hesitantly.

“No we should talk about this now.” She insisted. “I wanna know how you feel.”

Our romantic meal became long forgotten as sorrow passed through the depth of my body. I looked down trying to keep the pain that was radiating in my chest where it was.

“I . . . hate myself for what I did to you Sam. Sure we’re eighteen and we couldn’t raise a kid even if we wanted to but . . . you know they that a woman becomes a mother when she gets pregnant. A man becomes a father when he sees his baby. You were already attached to her and you didn’t even realize it. I—if I’d just stopped yelling at you and just paid more attention to the road you would’ve gotten your baby, our baby. Y—you wouldn’t have been in so much pain. You wouldn’t have cried and screamed and kicked at me… I took her way. Our baby girl I took her way.”

I closed my eyes looking down as my eyes began to sting tears welling up inside of them. It hurt so bad to know that it was my fault, that I was the reason behind any of Sam’s distress.

“Baby how could you feel that way?” Sam murmured.

“Because it’s true.” I mumbled lifelessly.

“No. it’s not.” She said voice firm, strong. “That accident was not your fault. It was an accident and how dare you blame yourself. It’s not fair to her or him, it’s not fair to me, and sure as hell is not fair to yourself. You cannot beat yourself up for shit that is not even in your control Justin. Okay so you were a hundred percent focused on the road. But neither was the drunk driver that ran into us. That’s what caused the accident okay? Not you, not me, but the guy who decided to get into his car intoxicated and not think about the life he could possibly take. Things happen for a reason Justin isn’t that what you always tell me? I was hurt because I lost the baby not because you took it away from me.”

Looking up into her eyes it tugged at my heart. I was hurting her by hurting myself because I thought that I’d hurt her, if that made any sense. She didn’t blame me for the miscarriage and it made me feel good to hear her say it. Her lips touched my hand trying to soothe me and it worked. Looking into her eyes my stomach filled with warmth.

“What do you want me to say?” I begged.

“I want you to not have this on your mind and to hold to it in your heart.” She said.

I sighed. “I can try but . . . it might take me some time. That really hurt Sam.”

“I’m here,” She whispered. “remember me? Your fiancé? I’m always here. We’re best friends Justin you can always talk to me.”

That made me smile. She’d never really called me her best friend like that before.

“I know.” I nodded. “I don’t know what I’d be without you.”

“Irrelevant? A dick?” She guessed.

I laughed a little. “Sure babe.”

She smiled. “So are we okay?”

I nodded. “We’re perfect, let’s eat.”

After all the heavy of the dream and the talk of the miscarriage we ate together moving on to lighter topics. The date was still romantic and I still did everything to make her blush and make her happy. It was unbelievable how much I’d missed her and her voice and her face. When she laughed it made me wanna say something funnier just to hear the precious sound again. I just couldn’t help but be thankful that she’d had that dream though. When you carry something on your chest for so long it feels good to get it out and tell someone. It feels even better to tell the love of your life.

“Thank you for lunch today baby.” She smiled softly as we got back into the van to head home.

I smiled back. “Anything for you.”

A blush ruptured in her cheeks making me chuckled a little and run my finger across the skin. Gosh she made me so happy.

“I just wanna say I’m proud of you for taking your pills and being strong while I was gone. Nick said you’ve done a great job and I know that you have.” I murmured.

“Shit.” She spat.

“W—what’s wrong?” I asked baffled.

“That’s why I’ve been so crazy lately. I knew I was forgetting something!” She gasped.

“Baby I’m confused what are you forgetting?” I begged for insight.

“My pills. I haven’t taken them in days I completely blanked.” She explained.

“Oh . . . well calm down.” I soothed rubbing her thigh. “We’ll be home soon you can take them there.”

She sighed peering up at me. “I’m sorry.”

“About what?” I asked, eyebrows knitting together.

“Ever since you got back you’ve been working so hard to give people a good performance and the last thing you need is taking care of me like I’m some baby. I’ve been running the whole day.” She mumbled.

“Well first of all you might not be a baby but you are my baby. Second of all my number one job in the world is to take care of you as a best friend, as a soon to be husband, and as a lover. Third of all the day can’t be ruined when we’re together. Even when you’re sad or depressed or maybe pissed off at me all of that is better than not being able to see you. It’s hard to be there for you when I can’t hold you. Everything is okay Sammy. I’m not mad and you shouldn’t be mad either. I just want you to be happy.” I told her.

The blood bubbled in her cheeks and a smile crept up on that beautiful face of hers. I reached my hand off her hip sliding it up her body till my fingers wrapped smoothly around her cheek.

“I love it when you blush. You’re beautiful.” I murmured.

Then they really turned read.

“I haven’t heard that in days.” She sighed.

I smirked. “what are you talking about? Millions of people tell you you’re beautiful everyday.”

“Yea but you know me. I only believe it when you say. It’s not the same when they do.” She shrugged.

I started to play with her hair twirling my fingers through some of the soft strands.

“So what you’ve been walking around all these days not feeling beautiful because I wasn’t here to say it?” I asked.

She sighed. “I mean when I look in the mirror I do feel beautiful. It’s just that it’s nowhere near as much as when you tell me so.”

“Maybe next time you’ll let me call you like a normal relationship.” I muttered.

She rolled her eyes. “Calm your balls Bieber it wasn’t that deep.”

“I will not ‘calm my balls’ Sam. That was a long ass time.”

“Not even.” She lied.

I decided to play the sad card. “So . . . y—you didn’t miss me at all?”

She looked up at me. “Justin stop it that’s not funny.”

I made my lip tremble. “I know it’s not. I just can’t believe you really didn’t miss me.”

I was just about to crack and start laughing when a weird sound came from Sam’s throat. Before I knew it tears were welling up in her eyes and she started to cry in front of me begging for forgivness. I dropped the façade automatically rushing to hug her tight and tell her I’m sorry when she began to giggle and wipe up the fakest fucking tears in all of the world.

“That was so not fucking funny Sam.” I spat.

She looked at me realizing just how pissed I was.

“Look let’s make up. We missed each other like crazy and it would really hurt my feelings if we got into a fight over something as stupid as this.” She muttered.

I looked at her biting my lip. “Kiss?”

A smile spread wide across her face. “Kiss.”

I reached my arms around her waist pulling her body close to me with a grin spread wide across my face. Our lips joined together smooth and sweet. My mouth tingled against hers kissing her again as those lips made everything so simple. Needing more I stuck my tongue out running it slowly across her bottom lip just begging for entrance. Her mouth slid open with a groan allowing me to dip inside and conquer her mouth. She reached her hand into my hair pulling endlessly on the ends and adding fuel to our passion. I kissed for what felt like forever but what could really have only been minutes. Pulling away my teeth caressed her bottom lip pulling on it passionately and listening to her moan.

“I love you.” I whispered voice husky.

“I love you too.” She murmured out of breath.

As I pressed our foreheads together and looked deep into her eyes I knew I was home and I knew that there was nowhere else I’d rather be.