chinmay2k5's JumboTweets
- Na daur-e-sharaab raha baaqi,
Na daur-e-shabaab raha baaqi,
Woh lazzatein to kab ki khatam ho gayi,
Magar yeh kambakht azaab reh gaya baaqi.
(Hyderabadi shayari) - A hard-worked ox is discontented with his own hard fare, when he sees a lazy pig being fattened up. Another ox explains that the pig is being fattened to be eaten; and the discontented ox accepts his position.
http://www.sacred-texts.com/bud/j1/j1033.htm#page_76 - Ek driver ek khaali bus chala raha tha. Dusri bus bhi khali thi aur uski driver Julie naam ki ek ladki thi. Tab pehle bus ke driver ne kaunsa gaana gaya hoga?
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Na kuch tere bus me Julie, na kuch mere bus me... - This just happened. A girl called her ex-bf on facetime (video chat) while she was giving a bj to some other guy. Just to make him jealous. The guy took screenshots and posted on his fb page. I don't know if that is right or wrong. But it's funny.
- I was thinking "Masses don't have to like, appreciate, understand or respect me. These are anyway such low level people. They are not worthy of understanding what I am. But at least they shouldn't insult me. If they are insulting me, they shouldn't at least hurt or harm me physically. My life should not be under threat." At least I achieved the last objective.
- A common evening in Mumbai used to be: a table at a Restaurant & Bar, paneer, roti, dal fry, rice, cold drink, hard drink (optional), 90s music especially Kumar Sanu songs (and more specifically Jab Koi Baat Bigad Jaaye), dim yellow lights and a TV playing random film on Zee Cinema or some sports. This is a really common sight. Why do these places play Kumar Sanu songs only?
जो बीत गई सो बात गई
जीवन में एक सितारा था
माना वह बेहद प्यारा था
वह डूब गया तो डूब गया
अम्बर के आनन को देखो
कितने इसके तारे टूटे
कितने इसके प्यारे छूटे
जो छूट गए फिर कहाँ मिले
पर बोलो टूटे तारों पर
कब अम्बर शोक मनाता है
जो बीत गई सो बात गई
- हरिवंश राय बच्चन- Is duniya me paida hona hi bahot bada insult hai. Aur is duniya ke logon ki shakal dekhna use bhi bada insult. Aur aise logon se insult hona to usse bhi bada insult.
- Ek divorcee aadmi ke do bachche hote hain. Woh ek divorcee aurat se shaadi karta hai jiske bhi do bachche hain. Unko shadi ke baad do aur bachche hote hain.
Pehle 4 bachche khelte hue chhote 2 bachchon ko peetate hain.
To biwi aake apne pati se bolti hai:
"aji sunte ho, tumhare bachche aur mere bachche milkar hamare bachchon ko peet rahe hain". - Africa me jab koi kunwari ladki raat bhar ghar nahi aati, aur doosre din jab woh ghar wapas aati hai to uski ki maa poochti hai "karamjali, kahan pe mu gora karwake aayi hai apna?"
- Ek ladka apni girlfriend ke father se rishte ki baat karne ke liye jaata hai.
'Uncle, main aapki beti ka haath maangne aaya hoon'.
Father asks 'kyun?'
Ladka: Main aapki beti ka haath maangne aaya hoon kyun ki mera haath ab thak gaya hai.