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Here's Your Problem @SimonvanKempen and @mccordalex - Alex, you approach the world from a frame of reference of logic and intellect - it's even in the cadence of your speech - and you give credit to all you encounter and communicate with that they are doing exactly the same thing. This may come as a bit of a shock, dear Alex, but... the world doesn't operate that way. People have their feelings and emotional triggers or buttons and most don't reflect on their own intellectual integrity and if you could even suggest such a thing to them, they'd give you a blank stare as in, "Huh??? What the hell is she talking about?"
I've seen you go into meetings and conversations with some of the other characters on RHONY and you are like a lamb to the slaughter. They trounce right past any valid point you might be making because you must be consigned to the little box where they've assigned you just so that you can be dismissed. To actually respond to you would require them to interact at the higher ground which is not their natural comfort zone. It's much easier to stick a label on you and react on a purely emotional level to that assigned label rather than see - and deal with - the real you.
They simply are not capable of any other kind of behavior although I do see that Jill recognizes there's work to be done. Some of the other ladies will only ever be in their bubble where they control all circumstances and anything that threatens that gets booted from the bubble. Posthaste.
Or haven't you ever noticed a certain tendency to prejudge certain individuals before they've even opened their mouths to speak and yet, no small amount of faux paus or downright bitchiness is forgiven on the part of others (whose own bubble existence is perceived as non-threatening)?
Give up. You want to yank folks into the light but it's rather impossible. If they don't want to go there, you'll only foment more excuses to define you as one-not-to-be-respected. Their respect never mattered in the first place, dear Alex. Yeah, I know you care. That's your burden to bear.
And Simon, you give off an energy or "vibe" that your approach or energy likewise comes mainly from your brains and not from your gonads. Just because you are not a hot bubbling mess of testosterone when you interact with the world, some folks say that sets off the "gaydar" and it's simply ludicrous. You don't need to care one whit what anyone says or thinks on that subject and I know that you already know that. But, I detect that you don't quite get why people would say such things in the first place. You don't lead with your sweaty balls, my dear, and that's the issue. Of course, it's not really YOUR issue, is it? You seem like a fellow who follows his own path and listens to his own drummer. Onward, brave Simon. You don't need to justify or apologize or feel encumbered by anyone else's peculiar attitudes. You are your own man. Stay that way.
I've seen you go into meetings and conversations with some of the other characters on RHONY and you are like a lamb to the slaughter. They trounce right past any valid point you might be making because you must be consigned to the little box where they've assigned you just so that you can be dismissed. To actually respond to you would require them to interact at the higher ground which is not their natural comfort zone. It's much easier to stick a label on you and react on a purely emotional level to that assigned label rather than see - and deal with - the real you.
They simply are not capable of any other kind of behavior although I do see that Jill recognizes there's work to be done. Some of the other ladies will only ever be in their bubble where they control all circumstances and anything that threatens that gets booted from the bubble. Posthaste.
Or haven't you ever noticed a certain tendency to prejudge certain individuals before they've even opened their mouths to speak and yet, no small amount of faux paus or downright bitchiness is forgiven on the part of others (whose own bubble existence is perceived as non-threatening)?
Give up. You want to yank folks into the light but it's rather impossible. If they don't want to go there, you'll only foment more excuses to define you as one-not-to-be-respected. Their respect never mattered in the first place, dear Alex. Yeah, I know you care. That's your burden to bear.
And Simon, you give off an energy or "vibe" that your approach or energy likewise comes mainly from your brains and not from your gonads. Just because you are not a hot bubbling mess of testosterone when you interact with the world, some folks say that sets off the "gaydar" and it's simply ludicrous. You don't need to care one whit what anyone says or thinks on that subject and I know that you already know that. But, I detect that you don't quite get why people would say such things in the first place. You don't lead with your sweaty balls, my dear, and that's the issue. Of course, it's not really YOUR issue, is it? You seem like a fellow who follows his own path and listens to his own drummer. Onward, brave Simon. You don't need to justify or apologize or feel encumbered by anyone else's peculiar attitudes. You are your own man. Stay that way.